How to deal with a difficult boss?
On the list of difficulties that can effectively spoil our enjoyment of the job, problems with superiors occupy a place of honor. No matter how many advantages has our job, this one annoyance is able to completely discourage us to it. Too many of us have had the misfortune to meet on your way up, the professional supervisor, by whom we started to doubt the human kindness and decency. I hope this text effectively tell you how to deal with similar situations in the future.
Let's start with the basics. How to recognize the chief despot? Most of us do not need to this any guidance. It is hard not to notice when we are dealing with the subject difficult and overbearing. It is worth noting a few universal traits, which are characterized by a despotic heads:
- Doesn’t want to listen to his subordinates and it happens that he ignores their ideas.
- Prefers using terms like: “I did”, “I create”, “I invented”. Reluctant to emphasize the participation of third parties in the performance of subordinated groups.
- He gives orders in commanding voice, dictates how the task should be done and the time of its execution
- Wants to know every little detail related to subordinates activity.
- Sparingly dosed praise, the most effective tool for motivating in his opinion is pointing out errors and verbal flips.
- He often raises his voice, has difficulties with controlling emotions, is unpredictable.
As you probably noticed, some of those examples of behaviour clearly interferes with mobbing. It’s very important to define at the beginning if the attitude of our head is within the generally accepted standards of behaviour in the workplace. If we’re ridiculed, intimidated, experiencing undue criticism, don’t even mention about psychological violence, you can be sure that’s mobbing, the victim may demand appropriate redress in court work. In this text we will focus more on the behaviour of our bosses, despite their nuisance within the range of socially acceptable and legal actions.
So how do you deal with a challenging boss? In the first place it is worth looking at the situation from a distance. Sometimes it is good to give up pride and consider the broader context of events. Yes, the boss is very annoying but we may see that his behaviour makes sense and concern for the good of the company? Maybe we react to his behaviour with exaggerated sensitivity? As psychologists emphasize, self-confidence and uncompromising boss makes work takes rhythm. Such a supervisor is able to discipline himself and other, driving the group to cope with new and more difficult tasks. If the person manages to grab the other to make changes should then reduce their authoritarian inclinations. But what if our boss did not not want to be limited?
Fist of all: peace of mind. Whatever will happen, we can’t be provoked. Let’s try to control your emotion, because they’re not a good advisor in such situations. For assistance in critical moments comes psychology. To tame emerging in you anger and frustration, you need to spank a positive thought or association. Our boss has a bad day and clings to everything? Let's think about some of his advantage, or positive behaviour. Maybe tells good jokes? Maybe someday he let ill us go home early? With this playing, our tension will fall a little and we will be able to accept the taunts boss like the healthiest criticism.
In keeping calm in confrontations with superior will also help us imagining him in the funny, embarrassing situations. There is no way yet to take to yourself the unpleasant chief’s remarks when you see him your mind’s eye, sitting with his pants down on the toilet. Besides, with the assistance may come to us reliable counting in mind. Psychologists advise to the critical moment to go for a while in a secluded place and quietly count to twenty. Interestingly, apparently much better results after counting backward from twenty to one. Another interesting way to deal with an evil boss is imagining him in situations of our concern. Nursing superior image in my head as clumsy and in need of support automatically reduces the level of aggression and willingness to confront.
In the struggle for peace in dealing with superiors you should equip with a little knowledge of psychology. Toxic and autocratic people are usually people filled with life anxiety. Psychologists attribute such persons weakness, difficulty in interpersonal relations, sometimes even personality disorders. Constant desire to compete and control often results from the deep problems of self-esteem. It is worth remembering that the pursuit boss to total subordination us his will is normally the result of the weakness of his, not ours.
The most effective tactic in dealing with such a person is so treat it like brings about the educational problems of a teenager. Let's show from the outset that there are limits which do not allow exceeded. Do not go into unnecessary discussions, reduces confrontations with the boss for specifics. Let's try to take control of the conversation, do not be afraid to ask. "What exactly do you blame me for?", "Is all that I did wrong in your opinion ?" - This question will make you be able to quickly finish the whole dispute, and above all show the boss that you do not give up easily surrender . Do not be afraid to also pay attention to the behaviour that we consider to be objectionable: "I understand your comments and I adopt them but I deserve respect that you did not show me." Let's try to do it but after some time, when the thrill of confrontation on both sides of tempers.
It has long been proven that happy employees perform their duties effectively, rarely get sick, strongly identify with their company. Harassed staff experience, in turn, decrease the quality of your work, productivity and performance. It is a pity that so many employers forget about that, delegating managerial positions person who has problems with dealing people.
Remember, however, that there is never a hopeless situation, because when your boss starts to behave in a despotic manner, use one of our advice and focus on what is really important - your duties and positive people that surround you in workplace.
See also: How to Prepare for a Job Interview?